Lost friendships are like bad breakups; a lot of them do not have any closure. They just fizzle away over time. Close to the end of the year, I always see tweets and Instagram posts about cutting people off and leaving people (friendships) in the year that is soon to pass. It is an easy pill to swallow when you are the one with the scissors. But, what about the abandoned friends? Granted, a lot of people are claiming to cut off toxic friends rather than loyal and supportive friends. Nonetheless, I wonder how many of the people “cutting people off” have told their soon-to-be ex-friends where their friendship took the wrong turn, how they were hurt, etc. The so-called “toxic” friend may be unaware of their wrongdoings and never have the chance to realize, apologize, and be forgiven. I wonder if the person cutting off friendships asked their friends what, if any, hardships they were enduring at the time communication was lost. I wonder if they evaluate themselves and their contribution to the friendship.
As stated in my previous blogs, I think friendships have a lot of things in common with romantic relationships; both require effective communication, equal effort, honesty, support, forgiveness, understanding, etc. Many friendships exist longer than romantic relationships, but a lot of people tend to put more energy into temporary romantic relationships than they do their friendships. People forgive their significant others for their dishonesty without much discussion or hesitation but cut their friends off after a missed event, miscommunication or a period of limited communication.
I think friendships are just as important as romantic relationships. Non-romantic relationships are another form of emotional support, happiness, encouragement, ventilation, etc. I think, today, people are so focused on appearing unbothered and avoiding vulnerability, that they miss out on the beauties of a good friendship.